Mommy Pants - I Should Probably Quit

I don't know, don't know anything
Just winging it as a guy that never learned how to fly
I'm just bringing it
The way I do when my wiener makes the girls cry
Because it's too small, oh god why
Could I not have been 4 inches
A dick that size could have helped me get by
Just kidding, I'm seven and a half, years old
With a ten inch dingaling I'm told
By my aunt Teresa, she's fifty four years old
She said, I wanna sleep with ya, baby boys are way more bold
Ok, onto the next thing
Not a pervert, just a victim
Was trying to wait for the right one
Should not have wore my skirt for fun

Life's a show, and I'm not even on set
I'm a retard in the backyard
Hopping in my imaginary jet
I was born for toaster strudels
I'm alive to lose every bet
Can only afford ramen noodles
Because I'm too far in debt
Super Novas don't need plastic surgery
But check out these movie stars in space
They've never seen me
Probably from all the weight in their face
I really love mathematics
Cause me plus drugs was a fun habit
Minus the people I don't like
Equaled up to a quite good night
I actually don't like math
Cause multiple relationships divided by I suck
Means it's not gonna last

I don't know, I don't know
Try to cook my head in the microwave
The door won't shut though
Tired of the looks I get at the library
For wearing just my onesie
They ask why my balls are hanging out
They need to breathe
Now may I check out these picture books please

Written by:
Brandon Harig

Publisher:
Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid, Songtrust Ave

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