Doug McKenzie and Bob McKenzie - Twelve Days of Christmas

Okay, good day, this is our Christmas part of the album
And you can play this at your Christmas parties, uh
Or to yourself on Christmas Eve, if there's nothing else to do
Good day, eh? (Yeah)
In case you thought, like, I wasn't on this part
Oh, I guarantee ya, you'd be on

Okay, so, good day, this is the Christmas part
And we're gonna tell you what to get, uh, your true love for Christmas

Look out the window
Where? What are you doing?
Snow, hosehead
Wha? Oh, it's the Great White North, and it's snowing
'Cause it's Christmas time

Hey, hoser
What?
Here's a quiz, quiz for Doug
Okay, I have my thinking toque on
Yeah, right
What are the twelve days of Christmas?
'Cause, figure it out, right Christmas is when? (Um)
Uh, the 25th
Right, and what's the 24th, Christmas Eve, right?
So, that's two and then, what's after that? (That's two)
Um uh, Wrestling Day (Boxing day)
No, get out (Boxing Day, yeah, yeah)
That's three (I knew)
Then what's after that? Nothing
New Year's
Four and what's
New Year's Eve
Five, where do you get twelve? (Okay)
Uh there's two Saturdays and Sundays in there, that's four
That's nine and three other days, which I believe are the mystery days

Okay now
This is our Christmas song
In case you don't know what to get somebody for Christmas
There's lots of ideas in here, so, listen, and don't get stuck
Okay
By the way, that's me on the organ
Aw, Jeez
You start
Okay

On the first day of Christmas
My true love gave to me, a beer

On the second day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Two turtlenecks and a beer (okay, good)
On the third day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer (okay)

That should be more there, eh?
Where? On, go

Fourth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer
In a tree, see you need more (oh, yeah)

The fifth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Five golden toques
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, what was it? In a tree

Okay, on the sixth, go
Christmas, my true love gave to me
Six packs of two four
Five golden touques (beauty)
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree

Okay (kay)

On the seventh day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Seven packs of smokes
(Nice gift) oh, six packs of two four
Five golden touques
Four pounds of backbacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer in a tree

Right, I keep forgetting
Phew! This should just be the two days of Christmas
It's too hard for us

Um
Go, hoser
Oh

On the eighth day of Christmas
My true love gave to me
Eight comic books
Seven packs of smokes
Six packs of two four
Five (five golden toques)
(Four pounds of back bacon)
(Three French toast)
(Two turtlenecks)
And a beer on my tree

Yeah, That beer's empty
Okay, day (twelve), uh, twelve
Good day, and welcome to day twelve

Five golden toques
Four pounds of back bacon
Three French toast
Two turtlenecks
And a beer, in a tree

Beauty, eh?
Where'd you learn to do that?
Uh, albums
Boy, so, like, that's our song, merry Christmas
Merry Christmas
And good day
Good day, everybody
Hap-happy New Year, too

Okay, you know what you left out?
What?
Donuts
I told you to get me donuts (oh no)
Either on the ninth day or the tenth day
Or the eleventh day, I wanted donuts (okay, the song's over)

But I want (merry Christmas, everybody)
Or on the twelfth day, you coulda got me a dozen donuts
So, go out to the stores, and get some presents
You coulda gone down to, like, the good donut shop
Where if you buy a dozen, you get another one free
And then, been thirteen for the thirteen days of Christmas

Well, next Christmas, get me a chainsaw
Take off
Boy, that song was a beauty, it, it moved me
Yeah, I think it ranks up there with Stairway to Heaven
What?

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Doug McKenzie and Bob McKenzie

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